


The Parting Glass

by Shonnyterra



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Drabble, Gen, Post-Chroma Conclave, Scanlan is just being sad, Scanlan misses his friends even though he's having fun, thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-16
Updated: 2018-08-16
Packaged: 2019-06-28 11:38:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15706467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shonnyterra/pseuds/Shonnyterra
Summary: Scanlan has parted from Vox Machina and is alongside his daughter Kaylie. Post-Chroma Conclave. Scanlan is beginning to ponder and go into deeper thoughts about the decision he has made.





	The Parting Glass

The smell of alcohol and roasted meats filled the air, causing the gnome bard to stop in his place and admiring the new environment. Scanlan’s eyes follow the patrons in the area that caught his attention. Kaylie stood behind him, making her way past him and hunkering down into one of the tables off to the side. Kaylie catch sights of one of the wenches to get a few drinks handed off.

Scanlan wanders over to her side, but his gaze can’t help but move across the band of bards settled in their own seats. The music they played was reminiscent of his own. A feeling of sadness swells in Scanlan’s chest, resting himself down next to Kaylie as he watches them. There was a subtle nudge from his daughter and he turns to her with his characteristic smile.

“Did you order us drinks?” Scanlan’s arms ease onto the back of the chair.

“’Did you order us drinks?’ Who the fuck do you think you’ve been travelling with for a month? Of course I did.” Kaylie frowns more as she greets the bar maid with a subtle nod.

Scanlan doesn’t take her commentary to heart, not when he has been with her for long enough every day to realize when she was just trying to pry. The quiet viola rings through the crowded tavern, causing people to hush their voices for just a single instance of that melody. The harmony equally entrances the flood of people and Scanlan cannot resist raising a curious brow towards the small troop.

A group of maybe five people surround the dusty corner, with the barkeep watching them closely and idly cleaning a mug. The barkeep must really enjoy this troop, since their gaze is intense. The troop was primarily gnomish in nature, which gave Scanlan a bit of reprieve.

“Oi, you better not be eyein’ up one of the gnomish ladies.” Kaylie harshly whispers into her father’s ear.

“Kaylie, you know that I wouldn’t be eyeing up any women here.” Scanlan reassures before catching her cynical stare.

“That’s right. Ye’d be doing it when I wasn’t here. So I’ll be staying here for that reason.” Kaylie takes a large sip of her ale after looking back to the group.

Scanlan winces at her comment, knowing that trust was something he would continue to earn over time. The moments he had alone with her daughter… for the last month or so has been more than just rewarding, it was enlightening. Scanlan found himself wondering what it might be like to sing like he has with Vox Machina. Would it be possible to bring back the joy around them like he has had with Kaylie?

The brewing emotions fester inside of Scanlan, causing him to simply hold the mug of ale in his hand without drinking. Scanlan was quickly reminded of the emotions and confusion he felt during his last encounter with his comrades. Vox Machina barely knew him… they barely understood him and didn’t necessarily care to try. The sudden realization of that anger pools in his stomach, leading Scanlan to look away from the wooden table and peer back at the bards.

Their music was charming… but Scanlan didn’t feel as charming as he usually did. His brow was furrowed and even Kaylie could tell something was bothering him. The young gnome decides to leave her eyes grasping at the crowd, hearing their cheers towards the bards for their cheery performance. The tavern was bustling, and the people inside had smiles plastered over their faces.

“Uhm, did you want something else to drink, sir? You haven’t taken but a sip of the ale.” The bar maiden interrupts Scanlan’s self loathing mind.

“Ah, no no. The ale is mighty fine! I simply was giving myself a moment to… savour it.” Scanlan brings back his playful smile, but he notices it doesn’t hit the point when the bar maiden winces slightly.

“Of course…” The bar maiden steps away only for Scanlan to hear Kaylie make a loud raspberry type sound.

“They aren’t _that_ good. That flutist can barely hold a note!” Kaylie hisses at the group.

Scanlan finds himself listening in to the sounds and can’t resist releasing a chuckle at the untuned sound. He couldn’t agree with Kaylie more as his daughter triumphantly stands up and closing the distance between them and the performers. Scanlan could never keep her seated, quickly noticing how she literally finished her drink in seconds.

Scanlan approaches behind Kaylie, viewing the frustrated faces on the performers when Kaylie corrects them on each of their notes and how the instruments should be tuned.

“Well, if you think you are so good, then why don’t you show us? Play us something.” The violinist glares down to them both. “Is she your girl?”

“Well… she is my daughter. I’m sorry if she was being disrespectful…” Scanlan moves next to Kaylie, knowing she wouldn’t let him move past.

“She called us shitty players, and since she is your responsibility, how will you make up for her words?” The flutist crosses her arms with a raised brow.

Scanlan notices Kaylie about to speak and finds himself raising a hand to silence her. He knew he would hear about this later, but this was a moment when his small, ever miniscule paternal instinct kicked in. Stepping forward, Scanlan releases a smile towards the group before him.

“We can play you a song… that is what you asked for, yes? A debt paid with a song played?” Scanlan bows ever so slightly, offering his lute as an instrument to use.

Throughout the day, Scanlan struggled to bring back his charm due to these deep seeded emotions inside of him, and at this instance, the group before him seemed to be lulled into his convincing words. Scanlan felt… _something_ break inside of him. Not physically, but emotionally, maybe mentally as the group moved into their positions. Kaylie tugs at her father, but Scanlan rests a single hand over her shoulder to signal to come.

Taking a few extra moments to set up, the group peer down at Scanlan. The silent one of the group watches as Scanlan shifts to their view.

“What do you know? What can you all play?” Scanlan blinks for a few moments as they ponder to themselves.

“Play what you want. Play what you are _feeling._ ” The quiet one finally spoke, a white haired gnomish woman with a tender face.

The facial structure, the kind voice, the sweet complexion, even if aged, all reminded him of Pike. The spread of new emotions flood Scanlan’s mind, and his eyes widen to the confusion that sets in. There is conflict, constant conflict, but he found himself accepting a small thing within himself… something he needed to convey, even if Vox Machina couldn’t hear it.

Scanlan begins singing before the band even starts.

 

_Of all the money that e'er I had_

_I spent it in good company_

_And all the harm I've ever done_

_Alas it was to none but me_

The violin begins to chime in, filling in alongside Scanlan’s gentle strumming of the lute between his fingers. Scanlan’s eyes closed ever so slightly.

 

_And all I've done for want of wit_

_To mem'ry now I can't recall_

_So fill to me the parting glass_

_Good night and joy be to you all_

There is a pause between the next set of words, entrancing the people around him. Scanlan opens his eyes slightly as he finds himself peering to the violinist and the quiet lute player for que. Kaylie observes her father… seeing something, but she can’t tell what it is.

 

_So fill to me the parting glass_

_And drink a health whate’er befalls_

_And gently rise and softly call_

_Good night and joy be to you all_

Scanlan feels the warmth fill his body, the music filling his ears, his breath, his chest, his heart. His fingers find purchase between the strings of his lute and notices the other band members lift their equipment to play alongside him. Kaylie is silent, her eyes noticing everyone gravitate towards the slightly larger group. It was contagious at this point… and her father sounded beautiful.

_Of all the comrades that e'er I had_

_They're sorry for my going away_

_And all the sweethearts that e'er I had_

_They'd wish me one more day to stay_

The passion only increased, the gnome bard’s brow furrowed more as the lyrics fill his mind and release from his lips as emotion flood through him. Rarely was Scanlan ever emotional, rarely was Scanlan ever wanting to expose parts of him that people could use against him. But in this moment, Kaylie could see it, these strangers could see it.

 

_But since it fell unto my lot_

_That I should rise and you should not_

_I gently rise and softly call_

_Good night and joy be to you all_

 

Scanlan’s fingers strum harder, and the patrons grow almost completely silent. Their focus on Scanlan, on Kaylie, on the band, and their attention was focused on the emotion just as Scanlan was in uncovering the lingering emotions inside of him.

 

_Fill to me the parting glass_

_And drink a health whate’er befalls_

_And gently rise and softly call_

_Good night and joy be to you all_

Scanlan releases his instrument to let one of the band members go. But he comes back in, passion strong and emotions swirling in alongside the raw unveiling of Scanlan Shorthalt. The softness in Scanlan’s eyes reveal the gentle glow coming from his bag. He could feel the gentle, subtle vibration from his bag as Mythcarver radiates the flow of music from Scanlan’s being.

Kaylie doesn’t hesitate to allow her gaze to follow the length of Scanlan’s body, all the way to the glowing utensil he held in his bag. Scanlan told her everything, so she knew about Mythcarver… and that brought a sense of understanding to Kaylie. She knew he was vulnerable, almost as vulnerable when he died.

 

_But since it fell unto my lot_

_That I should rise and you should not_

_I gently rise and softly call_

_Good night and joy be to you all_

The music filled the room, bringing a sense of understanding, belonging, and recognition to all the patrons in the room. Their lips were shut, eyes were watering, and hands clenched against their glasses or opposing hand to contain their emotions. Scanlan’s performance truly affected more people than just himself. And even though Scanlan was a performer, rarely did his tales come in a form such as this.

 

_So fill to me the parting glass_

_And drink a health whate’er befalls_

_And gently rise and softly call_

_Good night and joy be to you all_

_Good night and joy be to you all._

For a few moments, there is a silence that falls across the cast of people. That moment is quickly vanquished when the patrons erupt in cheers, calls, and applause towards the group. The quiet lute player claps as well, leaving the other band members in utter awe. There is a moment where Kaylie thinks of clapping but seeing the conflicted emotions over her father’s face causes her to reconsider the idea.

“I hope that is payment enough, gentlemen and gentlewomen… I bid you, bidet.” Scanlan’s eyes widen as he listens to what he just said… but he makes his way out of the room.

Kaylie, trailing behind him, notices the patrons looking at Scanlan after the such a performance and hears the dull whispers from each of them. Her anger and frustration boil; simmering inside of her as she watches Scanlan just continue upstairs.

There are a few moments where Kaylie attempts to reach out, murmuring her father’s name a few times before she takes her hand out to grab his sleeve. Scanlan stops in place, breathing in deeply as he is turned around roughly. What Kaylie sees is defeat, like what she saw the days after he woke up… after he was embarrassed by his comrades, but not as angry. Scanlan was sad. He was horribly sad without his Vox Machina.

“Did you want to…” Scanlan lifts his hand to Kaylie without a word.

“It’s fine. Let’s just get going.” Scanlan continues making his way out the tavern door.

That day wasn’t spoken about. Scanlan didn’t remind himself of the broken moment he had, but instead reminded himself that after all of this, maybe he would see Vox Machina again. And after all he had done, if he didn’t see Vox Machina again, at least he knew that his actions were his own. That what he said was on him… and that he knew he loved each and every one of them more than he loved many others.

**Author's Note:**

> The song "The Parting Glass" is the general theme, and the rendition that was chosen was Celtic Woman's rendition since it is a little longer and has a lot of power (in my opinion). Thank you for reading and I hope you all enjoy it!


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